I have found myself saying "I can't be bothered to even do that/teach like that anymore" a few times recently. I know I don't really mean what this statement actually expresses. Saying it actually makes me feel uncomfortable the moment it has passed my lips! So, I have had a mental potter about the whole thing. And I realise, what I actually mean is -I don't have the energy to spare on that anymore, or that just no longer rings true for what I want to do in my life/teach in my classes.
There are times in life where it is great to explore every opportunity, and try everything that comes our way. And there are times where we must streamline our efforts. It might be because of life circumstances which no longer give us the time or energy to spare. Or it might be because doing certain activities are no longer in line with our values. They are no longer authentic expressions of our energy, our life force, our prana. Like a supersized exercise in sense withdrawal! We can withdrawer from actions and activities which stimulate us in ways that we no longer wish to engage with. And focus on the ones which stimulate us to relax and renew in a positive way. What is the point in getting rest if we then waste our precious energy? And I need to be more careful of the words I use! It is noticeable I say these vague silly things like "I can't even be bothered" when I am tired. They make me feel uncomfortable. I think that is because they are not really what I mean. But I have then put that vibration out there. That has become an expression of how people hear what I say and in turn view me. And it is not what I want to be like, or be seen as. So, in the unlikely event of being able to get more significant rest in the near short term future I would like to try and practice being more thoughtful of what is coming out of my mouth! It is not just what others hear. It is what I hear, and if I am not careful it will calcify as a truth in my life. When, at present, it really isn't! Wishing you positive vibrations! Charlotte xx
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March 2021
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